Wednesday 10 August 2016

James Raggi Should Totally Hire Me...

...because I have a brilliant idea for a Lamentations of the Flame Princess adventure.

Lamentations has done a whole series of adventures set in seventeenth-century England: No Salvation for Witches, Death Love Doom, Forgive Us, England Upturn'd, and The Squid, the Cabal, and the Old Man. I've not read them all, but I think I'm right in saying that they are all set in the eastern part of England, which is over-populated and flat and boring. Everyone knows that D&D adventures should be set in hills and forests and mineshafts instead.

SO:


The setting is Devon in the autumn of 1685. The Duke of Monmouth's rebellion against King James II has just ended in bloody ruin at the Battle of Sedgemoor; in reprisal, Judge Jeffreys is riding from town to town with his judicial murder roadshow, the Bloody Assizes, and mass executions of actual and suspected rebels follow in his wake. The Second Tangier Regiment has been unleashed upon the civilian population. The hacked-off limbs of quartered traitors, painted with tar to preserve them, now stand impaled on pikes in the market squares of miserable Devonshire villages. Corpses dangle from the trees and hang in clusters from the gibbets, their chains clinking in the wind.

Into this chaotic situation stumble the PCs, lured by stories of ancient treasure hidden in the Devon hills. From the Doone Gate in Exmoor, where a clan of cannibal bandits guard the entrance to a hidden valley, to the wilds of Dartmoor, where the ghost of Lady Howard rides over the hillsides in her coach of bones, they will hunt among Druidic megaliths and the secret stashes of Sir Francis Drake while trying very hard not to get executed for being in the wrong place at totally the wrong time. But they're not the only ones looking for the treasure, and the infamous commander of the Tangier Regiment, Colonel Kirke, has send a team of his most merciless minions out to follow the trail on his behalf. Will the PCs find gold and power among the hills of Devonshire? Or will they, like the Duke of Monmouth, end their careers under Jack Ketch's axeblade up on Tower Hill?


The Coach of Bones: coming probably-never from Lamentations of the Flame Princess. Pirates, witches, ghosts, cannibals, magic, treasure, standing stones, large-scale violence, lame 'Captain Kirk' jokes... this one's got it all!

10 comments:

  1. Add a demonic hound in the moor as an encounter and my heart is yours !

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    1. Given that the whole point would be to throw in as much Devonshire legend lore as possible, I think that having some kind of Black Dog out on Dartmoor would be inevitable...

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  2. lots of shit in the moors - i did d d100 one once but spooky ponies, pagan spirits, ghosts, villages out of time for 24 hours, plenty of literary precedence. Plenty of places in area look unchanged since 1700s

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    1. The 'lonely moors at night' table, right?

      I love the fact that you have a 1d100 table for absolutely *everything*...

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  3. Jim seems a pretty cool guy. If you send him a finished manuscript I am sure he'd at least read it.

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    1. I have the impression that he's pretty snowed-under with projects just now. But I guess sending out a feeler email couldn't hurt...

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  4. You should do this. It really sounds awesome!

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    1. Thanks! People seem to really like the idea, so I just might actually try to make it happen...

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  5. For what it's worth, you're one of my favorite DIY D&D bloggers who hasn't put anything out in print, and decidedly the best who's currently active and doesn't have any way for me to give them money. Given that James Raggi didn't have time to do Maze of the Blue Medusa he may not have time to add anything by you to his schedule, but I'd love to see something from you in print through LotFP or any other channel you find.

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    1. Thanks! I do have some ideas, but I write stuff for a living, so publishing things feels like work: the reason I enjoy writing blogposts is because I don't need to worry about wordcount or deadlines or layout. Still, it seems like as many as fifteen people might actually want this, so I guess the market has spoken!

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